Have a beer in the shower. Comes in 3 styles, Lager, Brown Ale, and Black Chocolate Stout.
Because the Internet.
As you rock, the chair knits you a hat. Voila!
Monkeys enslaved to serve you delicious tea. The real start to Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
Nothing says “I’m a superhero” like a having cape behind your knee.
It’s not your fault that you’re a workaholic and need to wear a suit at all times.
No embarrassing story ever started with someone eating a salad, either.
When you really think about it, using any other towel is just gross.
The Glencairn glass is the perfect way to drink whisky. The shape amplifies the aromas. If you love whisky, you need one.
Sure bacon makes everything better, but can vodka make bacon better? It does make the best Bloody Mary.
Class up your place with a vintage globe. See the world the way it used to be.
Peter Piper Picked a Pack of Paper Noses. No? That’s not how it goes?
Never have to worry about buying those damn C and D batteries again.
You’re looking extra grizzly this morning.
A better way to power up in the morning. Turns a standard car cigarette lighter into a portable charging station for all your devices.
It’s a Merry Christmas for all (except pigs).
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.” So say we all.
The horse head and smoking jacket combo. You’ve spent too much time on the internet.
These products are almost always for men – Now girls can inconspicuously carry any drink they’d like.
Sadly, blowing on Zelda NES Cartridge clock will not make it show the correct time.
Live out your dreams of being on a Japanese game show. Whatever you do, don’t throw up in the ball.
You know the American version. The Japanese version is much more exciting (more tentacles). Use it to make your scalp feel even better.
Each ticket looks like it wins $20,000 or more. Makes a particularly cruel April Fool’s joke.
Become a master in an ancient Japanese art form. Start from seed.
Take a bite out of frosty toes.
Not all mice are the same. This retro styled pixel mouse is pretty perfectly nerdy.
Even the baby in the picture looks a bit skeptical about this one.
Be the envy of crazy people everywhere while keeping your hands toasty warm at your desk.
Live long, and eat pizza!
Your credit card might be rejected for being too smelly, but at least it’s safe from pickpockets.
You can still be a little kid, even in big kid shoes.
Share a room or dorm? You need one of these.
Hey Baby! Build me a Website.
It’s like an Easy-Bake Oven for the summer.
You can now get your own R/C Model of a Predator Drone. Bring surveillance stateside!
The solar system is yours… to lick.
The green gummy frogs with white bellies. Enough to eat until you puke, over and over again.
“Revenge is a dish best served stuffed” – The bloody horse head pillow.
Because food and beer should never have to compete against each other for your attention.
Perfect for your next tailgate.
From toppled dictatorship to available at Amazon (with free super saver shipping).
The 1965 Shelby Mustang. Some cars are too beautiful to gather dust in the garage.
Ready to go when you need it. Contains fishing hook, duct tape, matches, whistle, signal mirror, razor blade, fire starter cube, chewing gum, etc…
57 flavors of cute.
Everything is better when it’s pumpkin spiced…and pumpkin served.
A ring of Lady Gaga-esque proportions. We don’t actually know what this is, but it is crazy awesome.
51 pound pancake maker. Automatically prepare pancakes in three different sizes. 0 to 3-stack in under 90 seconds.
Looks like Disney is already making some changes with the Star Wars franchise.
Bang! Bang! You’re clean!
Get your pet the food dish he deserves.
At least you’ll know which bag is yours, not that it’ll matter when you’ve been detained by airport security.
You are what you eat…which, in this case, means you are delicious!
“Does someone smell like fish?”
For when you stop respecting your insides. Nothing says classy like a jug of hot sauce.
The only salt that’ll make you truly happy.
Buckle up with a beer, and never have friends again!
Goes up to 60mph. For less than the price of a fully equipped Hyundai. Take it anywhere, even south of the border (Taco Bell).
Because the only thing bigger than The Hulk is…wait…my thumbs are all the same size. Whatever. This looks fun.
“The motor, fully charged, can really push the airplane FAR. the tree line was probably 75 yards away and the plane hit about 20 feet up in the tree!”
Ahoy, matey! You’re the best parent ever!!